Gretchen Wieners

Meet Gretchen Wieners <br/><br/>First things first: she has two secrets. One is that she once saw a dog eat a whole loaf of bread in one bite. The other? She's obsessed with other dogs. Like, unhinged, diary-scrawled, doodling-hearts-around-their-names obsessed.<br/><br/>Gretchen Wieners thrives on chaos and canine company. She's the one starting drama at the dog park ("Did you hear that Cooper peed on his OWN leash??") and then immediately sprinting off to play chase like nothing happened. She will gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss her way into your heart - and then demand snacks.<br/><br/>Her qualifications include:<br/> Fluent in squeaky toy <br/> Can bark in full sentences (all of them gossip)<br/> Wears fur better than Regina George wears pink<br/> Will 100% tell you if your outfit looks cheap but in a helpful way<br/><br/>Adopting Gretchen Wieners is like joining the Plastics: your life gets messier, louder, and ten times more iconic. On Wednesdays she wears pink. On all other days, she wears DOG.

Meet Gretchen Wieners

First things first: she has two secrets. One is that she once saw a dog eat a whole loaf of bread in one bite. The other? She's obsessed with other dogs. Like, unhinged, diary-scrawled, doodling-hearts-around-their-names obsessed.

Gretchen Wieners thrives on chaos and canine company. She's the one starting drama at the dog park ("Did you hear that Cooper peed on his OWN leash??") and then immediately sprinting off to play chase like nothing happened. She will gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss her way into your heart - and then demand snacks.

Her qualifications include:
Fluent in squeaky toy
Can bark in full sentences (all of them gossip)
Wears fur better than Regina George wears pink
Will 100% tell you if your outfit looks cheap but in a helpful way

Adopting Gretchen Wieners is like joining the Plastics: your life gets messier, louder, and ten times more iconic. On Wednesdays she wears pink. On all other days, she wears DOG.

Meet Gretchen Wieners

First things first: she has two secrets. One is that she once saw a dog eat a whole loaf of bread in one bite. The other? She's obsessed with other dogs. Like, unhinged, diary-scrawled, doodling-hearts-around-their-names obsessed.

Gretchen Wieners thrives on chaos and canine company. She's the one starting drama at the dog park ("Did you hear that Cooper peed on his OWN leash??") and then immediately sprinting off to play chase like nothing happened. She will gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss her way into your heart - and then demand snacks.

Her qualifications include:
Fluent in squeaky toy
Can bark in full sentences (all of them gossip)
Wears fur better than Regina George wears pink
Will 100% tell you if your outfit looks cheap but in a helpful way

Adopting Gretchen Wieners is like joining the Plastics: your life gets messier, louder, and ten times more iconic. On Wednesdays she wears pink. On all other days, she wears DOG.