Gremlin

GREMLIN <br/>"Factory-installed security system. Optional volume control not included."<br/><br/>Meet Gremlin- a 2-3 year old Miniature Pinscher mix who weighs approximately "not much"... but firmly believes he is the Commander of the United States Armed Forces.<br/><br/>This dog has never once questioned his abilities.<br/><br/>Not once.<br/><br/>Need proof?<br/><br/>We recently took Gremlin to the veterinarian where they attempted to take his temperature using one of those fancy digital thermometers that don't even touch the dog.<br/><br/>Gremlin took this personally.<br/><br/>Then Gremlin transformed into what can only be described as an angry piranha crossed with a caffeinated alligator.<br/><br/>CHOMP! CHOMP! CHOMP!<br/><br/>The vet and technician were laughing so hard they could barely continue. Gremlin, meanwhile, was fully convinced he had just prevented an international incident.<br/><br/>The official recommendation?<br/><br/>"Please muzzle Gremlin next time."<br/><br/>The unofficial diagnosis?<br/><br/>Classic Miniature Pinscher.<br/><br/>If you've owned one...<br/><br/>...you're already laughing.<br/><br/>Gremlin also has another wonderfully ridiculous hobby.<br/><br/>He steals your clothes.<br/><br/>Not to destroy them.<br/><br/>Not to chew them.<br/><br/>He quietly carries your sweatshirt, sock, or t-shirt back to his bed because apparently sleeping next to something that smells like you is peak happiness.<br/><br/>It's equal parts adorable and slightly creepy.<br/><br/>Mostly adorable.<br/><br/>Then there's Gremlin's security business.<br/><br/>Take him to a friend's house?<br/><br/>Congratulations.<br/><br/>It's now Gremlin's house.<br/><br/>Anyone walking past the front yard will immediately be informed that they are being monitored by approximately 14 pounds of pure commitment.<br/><br/>Neighborhood watch?<br/><br/>Gremlin invented neighborhood watch.<br/><br/>Chipmunks?<br/><br/>Suspicious.<br/><br/>Birds?<br/><br/>Highly suspicious.<br/><br/>Leaves blowing across the yard?<br/><br/>Under investigation.<br/><br/>Delivery drivers?<br/><br/>Don't even think about it.<br/><br/>Gremlin firmly believes the yard should contain exactly three living things:<br/><br/>You.<br/><br/>Gremlin.<br/><br/>And maybe another dog friend if Gremlin approves the application.<br/><br/>His resume includes:<br/><br/> Neutered<br/> Up to date on shots<br/> Microchipped<br/> Professional Lap Dog<br/> Amateur Clothing Collector<br/> Certified Tiny Bodyguard<br/> President of the Backyard Wildlife Eviction Committee<br/><br/>Stanley loves people with his entire oversized heart. Once you're his person, congratulations-you now have a permanent escort.<br/><br/>Kitchen?<br/><br/>He's coming.<br/><br/>Living room?<br/><br/>Already there.<br/><br/>Bathroom?<br/><br/>He has no concept of privacy.<br/><br/>The only thing Gremlin takes more seriously than protecting you...<br/><br/>...is loving you.<br/><br/>Because despite all the ferocious barking, dramatic alligator impressions, and wildlife management responsibilities, Gremlin is, at his core, a tiny dog who simply wants to spend every possible second with his favorite human.<br/><br/>He'd do best in an adult home that understands his quirky little personality. Because food wasn't always guaranteed in his previous life, he prefers to enjoy his meals without interruption, and we think that's a perfectly reasonable request.<br/><br/>Gremlin isn't looking for an owner.<br/><br/>He's looking for someone to protect.<br/><br/>Whether they asked for it or not.<br/><br/> "Warning: Gremlin is a better mouser than a lot of the felines that come through our doors. He also has an aversion to anyone else in the rodent family!<br/><br/>**NOTE: Gremlin is not special needs, but is special pricing as he came from animal control fully vetted and fixed**

GREMLIN
"Factory-installed security system. Optional volume control not included."

Meet Gremlin- a 2-3 year old Miniature Pinscher mix who weighs approximately "not much"... but firmly believes he is the Commander of the United States Armed Forces.

This dog has never once questioned his abilities.

Not once.

Need proof?

We recently took Gremlin to the veterinarian where they attempted to take his temperature using one of those fancy digital thermometers that don't even touch the dog.

Gremlin took this personally.

Then Gremlin transformed into what can only be described as an angry piranha crossed with a caffeinated alligator.

CHOMP! CHOMP! CHOMP!

The vet and technician were laughing so hard they could barely continue. Gremlin, meanwhile, was fully convinced he had just prevented an international incident.

The official recommendation?

"Please muzzle Gremlin next time."

The unofficial diagnosis?

Classic Mini

GREMLIN
"Factory-installed security system. Optional volume control not included."

Meet Gremlin- a 2-3 year old Miniature Pinscher mix who weighs approximately "not much"... but firmly believes he is the Commander of the United States Armed Forces.

This dog has never once questioned his abilities.

Not once.

Need proof?

We recently took Gremlin to the veterinarian where they attempted to take his temperature using one of those fancy digital thermometers that don't even touch the dog.

Gremlin took this personally.

Then Gremlin transformed into what can only be described as an angry piranha crossed with a caffeinated alligator.

CHOMP! CHOMP! CHOMP!

The vet and technician were laughing so hard they could barely continue. Gremlin, meanwhile, was fully convinced he had just prevented an international incident.

The official recommendation?

"Please muzzle Gremlin next time."

The unofficial diagnosis?

Classic Miniature Pinscher.

If you've owned one...

...you're already laughing.

Gremlin also has another wonderfully ridiculous hobby.

He steals your clothes.

Not to destroy them.

Not to chew them.

He quietly carries your sweatshirt, sock, or t-shirt back to his bed because apparently sleeping next to something that smells like you is peak happines