Christi-FURY

Boo! 👻. Are you scared? You should be. <br/><br/>He may look like the perfect cuddly little lapdog, but ChristoFUR is a demon in disguise. He’s not technically with our rescue, but we know him well and can vouch for his awfulness. He’s run up quite the rap sheet, culminating in his previous owner calling the cops at 5am to have his terrifying fluffy white 12 pound a#! removed from her home. After a year of being terrorized, and she signed a permanent restraining order against him and he ended up in doggy jail and homeless once again. We think his issues stem from being born the wrong breed- he has all the qualities of a great police patrol or personal protection dog, but no one is hiring a Maltese/Shih Tzu/Gremlin mix for that job unfortunately, and he’s just never gotten over his disappointment that no one appreciates how amazing he would be at his dream job. No one cowers in fear at his mighty bark- they laugh, tell him he’s an adorable little baby and try to pet him anyway which just makes this short angry little man even more enraged. <br/><br/>Many things offend our little frenemy ChristoFURY. Top of the list: men, children, strangers, neighbors, interrupted nap time, delivery people, repairmen, vets, groomers, sharing food, being stared at, big or bouncy dogs, and many more. We are sure you will discover new things he hates as you navigate through life together. Remember back in 2020 when it was illegal to have parties, hug, or come within 6 feet of each other? He’s still busy enforcing those laws. Good times. Good times. <br/><br/>He’s definitely got some good qualities although he won’t admit to them. He’s quite a charmer with the ladies and many don’t heed our warnings when they see his cute wagging tail and friendly dance, asking to be petted. He’s ok with most other small dogs, though he’s the fun police if they get too rambunctious and will yell at them to dial it down. He gives plenty of warning if you just learn his rules and listen to them. He’s a good little walker, non-shedding, smart, and a helpful co-worker who likes keeping your desk chair warm (and sometimes dancing around on your keyboard trying to type out some kind of message mankind probably isn’t ready to hear). When he’s in a happy mood he will bring you his toy and carry it around showing it off, though he’s not really asking for you to take it or a game of fetch. <br/><br/>We think he’s about 8 years old, in pretty great health other than a mild heart murmur which doesn’t require medication at this time and we doubt will kill him anytime soon. He’s way too evil and has at least another 8 years of plotting to take over the world. We aren’t sure exactly what kind of home to advertise him to, and he doesn’t really know what he wants out of life at this point either and doesn’t seem eager to reflect and learn from his mistakes. He doesn’t make mistakes according to him, it’s all human error of not heeding his warnings of which he gives plenty. Like seriously, how many times does he have to tell you not to wake him up too early in the morning or lean over and kiss his head before bed before you learn your lesson?! That’s a YOU problem, if you incur his wrath he’s completely justified and has clearly documented his grievances with HR. He’s looking for a lady friend with a sense of humor and laid back attitude who won’t hold a grudge or be easily offended. He’s open to considering a humanoid AI robot too he can program to take orders from him, that would probably be ideal. (How far along are we on that technology? Hiring robots to adopt some of these dogs might be something we should look into 🤔). Other little chill dogs are ok as long as they can respect his space too. He definitely doesn’t need a wardrobe, and he’s scary enough that he definitely isn’t going to want to be dressed up for Halloween. Although he lets us put his Hannibal Lector muzzle on for grooming and vet visits. He’s open to learning to make more friends and accepts offers of chicken or cheese in exchange for his civility. But definitely isn’t going to be invited to any parties or greet the local school children getting off the bus. Long solitary walks in the woods and car rides to the drive-thru is more his speed. <br/><br/>If you are still reading and for some reason thinking this sounds like a great dog to adopt, either make an appointment with a good therapist, or better yet, apply to adopt him at rbari.org Ramapo-Bergen Animal Refuge<br/>and we can broker a meeting with ChristoFURocious and see what happens… if you think you can “fix” him, don’t bother- those relationships never work out if you aren’t ready to accept each other flaws and all, and he’s done with trying to fit into society’s convention of what a “pet” should be and looking to live life on his terms.<br/><br/>Since COVID-19, we are no longer holding our Sunday adoption events until further notice, but we are scheduling meet and greet appointments with a specific dog or dogs at our meeting spots in Northern NJ. To streamline adoptions, all communication before, during, and after the adoption process is done through email only: we have limited volunteers able to return phone calls. Submit an application from our website www.secondchance.petfinder.com to speed up the adoption process and email any questions to us at njwoof@cs.com. Please check your email regularly for next steps. All our dogs reside in foster care in Northern NJ until adoption and we do not have a central shelter location. We are a small all-volunteer organization focused on rescuing local dogs from area shelters, as well as accepting some surrenders and puppy mill rescues.

Boo! 👻. Are you scared? You should be.

He may look like the perfect cuddly little lapdog, but ChristoFUR is a demon in disguise. He’s not technically with our rescue, but we know him well and can vouch for his awfulness. He’s run up quite the rap sheet, culminating in his previous owner calling the cops at 5am to have his terrifying fluffy white 12 pound a#! removed from her home. After a year of being terrorized, and she signed a permanent restraining order against him and he ended up in doggy jail and homeless once again. We think his issues stem from being born the wrong breed- he has all the qualities of a great police patrol or personal protection dog, but no one is hiring a Maltese/Shih Tzu/Gremlin mix for that job unfortunately, and he’s just never gotten over his disappointment that no one appreciates how amazing he would be at his dream job. No one cowers in fear at his mighty bark- they laugh, tell him he’s an adorable little baby and try to pet him anyway which just makes this short angry littl

Boo! 👻. Are you scared? You should be.

He may look like the perfect cuddly little lapdog, but ChristoFUR is a demon in disguise. He’s not technically with our rescue, but we know him well and can vouch for his awfulness. He’s run up quite the rap sheet, culminating in his previous owner calling the cops at 5am to have his terrifying fluffy white 12 pound a#! removed from her home. After a year of being terrorized, and she signed a permanent restraining order against him and he ended up in doggy jail and homeless once again. We think his issues stem from being born the wrong breed- he has all the qualities of a great police patrol or personal protection dog, but no one is hiring a Maltese/Shih Tzu/Gremlin mix for that job unfortunately, and he’s just never gotten over his disappointment that no one appreciates how amazing he would be at his dream job. No one cowers in fear at his mighty bark- they laugh, tell him he’s an adorable little baby and try to pet him anyway which just makes this short angry little man even more enraged.

Many things offend our little frenemy ChristoFURY. Top of the list: men, children, strangers, neighbors, interrupted nap time, delivery people, repairmen, vets, groomers, sharing food, being stared at, big or bouncy dogs, and many more. We are sure you will discover new things he hates as you navigate through life together. Remember back in 2020 when it was