Luna

Senior Fetch Coordinator <br/><br/>I clock in the second a tennis ball hits the floor, usually right in the middle of the living room where all serious operations occur. Fetch is not a pastime-it's a performance metric, and I take pride in exceeding expectations. I know sit, stay, and exactly how long to hold eye contact before you realize I've already decided what we're doing next. I love people like it's part of my job description, because it is, and I assume everyone I meet is either a coworker or about to be promoted. I am house-trained, toy-motivated, and deeply committed to keeping morale high through strategic affection and frequent game launches.<br/><br/>There is one administrative detail: I have EPI, which just means my body outsourced digestion and now requires enzymes with meals so everything runs smoothly-no drama, no mystery, just a system that works when you follow the protocol. I consider this a routine, not a problem, and frankly I appreciate a household that respects schedules and systems as much as I do.

Senior Fetch Coordinator

I clock in the second a tennis ball hits the floor, usually right in the middle of the living room where all serious operations occur. Fetch is not a pastime-it's a performance metric, and I take pride in exceeding expectations. I know sit, stay, and exactly how long to hold eye contact before you realize I've already decided what we're doing next. I love people like it's part of my job description, because it is, and I assume everyone I meet is either a coworker or about to be promoted. I am house-trained, toy-motivated, and deeply committed to keeping morale high through strategic affection and frequent game launches.

There is one administrative detail: I have EPI, which just means my body outsourced digestion and now requires enzymes with meals so everything runs smoothly-no drama, no mystery, just a system that works when you follow the protocol. I consider this a routine, not a problem, and frankly I appreciate a household that respects schedules and systems as much as I do.

Senior Fetch Coordinator

I clock in the second a tennis ball hits the floor, usually right in the middle of the living room where all serious operations occur. Fetch is not a pastime-it's a performance metric, and I take pride in exceeding expectations. I know sit, stay, and exactly how long to hold eye contact before you realize I've already decided what we're doing next. I love people like it's part of my job description, because it is, and I assume everyone I meet is either a coworker or about to be promoted. I am house-trained, toy-motivated, and deeply committed to keeping morale high through strategic affection and frequent game launches.

There is one administrative detail: I have EPI, which just means my body outsourced digestion and now requires enzymes with meals so everything runs smoothly-no drama, no mystery, just a system that works when you follow the protocol. I consider this a routine, not a problem, and frankly I appreciate a household that respects schedules and systems as much as I do.