Epic

You can fill out an adoption application online on our official website.Meet Epic! Red Doberman | Female | 4 weeks old<br/><br/>Chaos Level: Pending Upgrade<br/><br/>WARNING: Contains excessive cuteness and potential for future world domination.<br/><br/>Hi, I’m Epic – a 4-week-old, wiggly red Doberman noodle with legs that are technically working (depending on which direction I fall today). I just discovered walking, eating this delightful mush humans call “gruel,” and expressing my opinions in squeaks and tiny barks that sound like a malfunctioning kazoo.<br/><br/>Right now, I’m small. Adorably small. But I have big plans. And I’m looking for a human (or entire village) who’s ready to raise a future majestic queen.<br/><br/>Why adopt a Doberman puppy like me?<br/><br/>Oh, I don’t know... do you enjoy:<br/><br/>Potty training? Great! I will absolutely teach YOU how to sprint across the house in your pajamas at 3am. (You're welcome.)<br/><br/>Chewing? I have 28 razor-sharp baby teeth and a deep desire to taste-test everything in your house – furniture, socks, feelings.<br/><br/>Obedience training? Ever wanted to bribe someone with snacks for eye contact? Welcome to the wonderful world of Doberman psychology.<br/><br/>In return, I offer:<br/><br/>Daily doses of zoomies so intense they could generate wind power.<br/><br/>Ears that may or may not stand up like satellite dishes (we’ll see – genetics are mysterious).<br/><br/>Snuggles so pure, your heart will explode into glitter.<br/><br/>Lifelong loyalty, and a personal security guard who’s currently 6 lbs but thinks she’s a T. rex.<br/><br/>Adopting me means:<br/>✔ You love a challenge.<br/>✔ You own shoes you’re willing to sacrifice.<br/>✔ You believe napping together counts as a team-building activity.<br/><br/>I’ll be ready for my forever home soon – once I’ve mastered this whole “walking like a land animal” thing and start learning my ABCs (Always Bite Chew-toys).<br/><br/>So if you’re ready to laugh, cry, lose a few socks, and fall madly in love with the most dramatic, spicy, snuggly little Doberman tornado in training – Epic is your girl.<br/><br/>Want to meet Epic? Submit an adoption application before she learns how to open cabinets. She’s going to be epic, trust us. FENCE required, application required, good pet care history required. we will check. To be considered you MUST read our policy and fill out an application. www.uniteddobermanrescue.org

You can fill out an adoption application online on our official website.Meet Epic! Red Doberman | Female | 4 weeks old

Chaos Level: Pending Upgrade

WARNING: Contains excessive cuteness and potential for future world domination.

Hi, I’m Epic – a 4-week-old, wiggly red Doberman noodle with legs that are technically working (depending on which direction I fall today). I just discovered walking, eating this delightful mush humans call “gruel,” and expressing my opinions in squeaks and tiny barks that sound like a malfunctioning kazoo.

Right now, I’m small. Adorably small. But I have big plans. And I’m looking for a human (or entire village) who’s ready to raise a future majestic queen.

Why adopt a Doberman puppy like me?

Oh, I don’t know... do you enjoy:

Potty training? Great! I will absolutely teach YOU how to sprint across the house in your pajamas at 3am. (You're welcome.)

Chewing? I have 28 razor-sharp baby teeth and a deep desire to taste-test everythin

You can fill out an adoption application online on our official website.Meet Epic! Red Doberman | Female | 4 weeks old

Chaos Level: Pending Upgrade

WARNING: Contains excessive cuteness and potential for future world domination.

Hi, I’m Epic – a 4-week-old, wiggly red Doberman noodle with legs that are technically working (depending on which direction I fall today). I just discovered walking, eating this delightful mush humans call “gruel,” and expressing my opinions in squeaks and tiny barks that sound like a malfunctioning kazoo.

Right now, I’m small. Adorably small. But I have big plans. And I’m looking for a human (or entire village) who’s ready to raise a future majestic queen.

Why adopt a Doberman puppy like me?

Oh, I don’t know... do you enjoy:

Potty training? Great! I will absolutely teach YOU how to sprint across the house in your pajamas at 3am. (You're welcome.)

Chewing? I have 28 razor-sharp baby teeth and a deep desire to taste-test everything in your house – furniture, socks, feelings.

Obedience training? Ever wanted to bribe someone with snacks for eye contact? Welcome to the wonderful world of Doberman psychology.

In return, I offer:

Daily doses of zoomies so intense they could generate wind power.

Ears that may or may not stand up like satellite dishes (we’ll see – genetics are mysterious).